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Tycho

Page Six, which can be found here, completes the first chapter of Automata.  The project itself directly expresses a fairly narrow band of the universe, hopefully enough to make you curious about the rest of it, and how this came to be the state of play.

Usually when we’re making things here, it’s about something we like - something we are genuinely interested in investigating.  Automata isn’t really like that.  I don’t really want to know what their awful world is like, but it is always revealing itself, and it’s always worse than I would have thought.  One of the worst things is on Page Three, hiding up in an advertisement for the Swangee Corporation: that there are lobotomized robots (lobotoma?) who look just like Carl, but possess none of the higher functions, no personhood, and when he passes them on the street he might not know which is which.

For Lookouts and Automata both, I’m starting to wonder if I’m satisfied with the amount of time we can devote to them.  I have devised a few scenarios for their perpetuation, because - to be frank - they deserve more than we’re prepared to give them.

You may recall that we were invited to co-host an episode of 1 vs 100 Live last Friday, and seeing how they put together an episode was completely fascinating.  If you’ve ever been out driving on 148th in Redmond, you know that Microsoft has a prodigious number of buildings there, but they aren’t especially demonstrative regarding their purpose, and the mind quickly fills in the gaps.  One building might house illegal birds.  Another feeds a batch of hermetic cryopods, there to ensure corporate continuity.

One building is devoted to exclusively to vats.

The building we went to was very much like (which is to say, it is) a fully functioning studio for the manufacture of audio and video.  It was radically unlike any place I have ever been to with a connection to software development - it shares some similarities with a mo-cap studio, but it’s purpose is much more pure.  There is a widescreen monitor of the game proceedings above the main board, which really cements just how strange the affair of humans producing a digital show is.  When you are there playing at home, pressing one of four buttons to assert yourself on the game system, know that there are at least five people working in real time to make that possible.  They leap and caper in a frenzied state for our amusement.

Chris Cashman, the host, has a different version of the game than players do: it has everything in the base version, but communicates a much broader range of data: number of players (thirty-two thousand!), full gamercard information for The One, count-downs for his segments, and count-ins to ensure everything is coming together correctly.  There was an issue with the countdown clock later in the show, but even that was exciting, because we had to take it into account on our own.  It was a “live performance,” but because it’s a live performance for digital people who represent real people, there’s a series of weird disconnects that your consciousness must navigate.  I loved it.

I get fascinated by sparkling things sometimes, things I want to incorporate into my nest, and it cinches a noose around my mind which locks me into a kind of inexorable “information accrual” mode.  Scientology is a perennial in this regard, to the extent that I actively avoid information about it because it’s too fascinating and I don’t want to join the “church” in a moment of weakness.  I recently had the misfortune of being exposed to some propaganda from the “seduction community,” and I’ve spent the weekend on a kind of data bender that has left me psychologically gutted.  I’ve been trying to navigate away from this page for about an hour now, and I can’t do it.  That these people are base manipulators should be apparent to any literate person; they’ve made a cage of language that I can’t escape from.

(CW)TB out.

she stirred her straw

Gabe

I don’t know, Love Systems doesn’t seem so bad to me. It’s really hard to talk to girls, and this is just helping guys with their confidence. Women are terrifying and strange, I don’t see anything wrong with getting some advice.


-Gabe out

 

Tycho

I’m fairly certain the purpose of this course is to make you a better predator of women.  Check out their offers of “in-field training,” as though you were going to hunt antelopes from a jeep in the Goddamned Savannah.   

(CW)TB

Gabe

I think you’re being overly dramatic. Girls have been using their “feminine wiles” to manipulate men since the beginning of time. Do you really think the mind games girls play on guys are any better or worse than this stuff. The only difference is that this sort of thing comes naturally to women. Guys are in a tight spot because in very real terms, we have nothing they want. They on the other hand, have vaginas. They can make us do pretty much what ever they want. I don’t see anything wrong with guys trying to learn some tricks of their own. 

 

-Gabe out

Tycho

This, from the dude who thinks it’s okay to have sex with unconscious women.  That must be considered the “ultimate” technique, something akin to true mastery.

(CW)TB

Gabe

Hold on just a second asshole. You are taking that comment way out of context!


We were having a conversation about Ambien Sex. You had told me that the  drug has been known to put people into a sort of horny trance. Eventually some questions about the morality of such a situation were brought up. What I said was that if your wife takes Ambien and then jumps you in the middle of the night wanting to get all freaky, I would not call that “rape”. That’s not the same as saying that going around having sex with unconscious girls is okay. We were discussing a hypothetical and I gave my opinion.

-Gabe (I am not a rapist) out

Tycho

I’m not sure the people who espouse these “love systems” or “dating sciences” want much to do with women outside of their role as the variable in some bizarre equation they’re endlessly iterating.  And if you aren’t interested in women, or at any rate you aren’t interested in actual women, or if you are only interested in a subset of a woman’s physicality, there’s an app for that.

(CW)TB

Gabe

Listen, I would never personally take a class like this. I think it’s silly and expensive. All I am saying is that I can relate to guys who are scared to talk to girls and I can understand how desperate they might be for help. Obviously I don’t approve of hunting women from the back of a jeep and if that’s the intent of this shit then yeah it’s fucked up. If it gives guys genuine tips for getting past their anxiety around a girl then I think it’s fine.


-Gabe out

Gabe

Wow, just fucking wow.


I decided to play devil’s advocate yesterday with Tycho just because that’s something I enjoy doing. I think in reality I fall somewhere in the middle of this argument but that’s not as much fun. What I didn’t expect was to get flooded with mail from guys thanking me for sticking up for this system because they use it. I also got my share of mail from angry girls but honestly I expected that. I made some pretty ridiculous exaggerations for the sake of a silly argument. Just like any time we exaggerate for the sake of a joke, we end up offending people who don’t see the humor in it. We’ve been doing this for ten years and so the angry mails were no surprise. It was the mails from guys thanking me that really threw me for a loop. 

Like I said, I was trying to be ridiculous but in reality I guess I sort of hit on something. As someone who was diagnosed with, and currently takes medication for chronic anxiety I suppose I should have expected it. You can go back through the archive here and find my posts about anxiety. It was something I lived with for as long as I could remember and it was horrible. What I didn’t really understand until I started taking medicine was that the constant worrying and anxiety had also lead to depression. Once I was on Lexapro I started to feel…well good and I finally had a frame of reference. When you’re always depressed and worried you don’t understand that there is any other way to feel. It probably sounds crazy to people who’ve never had to deal with it but it’s true. 

One of the effects of my anxiety was that I couldn’t talk to girls. My wife Kara was the the first girl I ever went on a date with and the fact is I didn’t even ask her out myself. My friends at the time knew that I liked her but also knew that I would never be able to ask her on a date. I was in my early twenties and I had never really talked to a girl for longer than a couple of minutes. My friends knew this and so like some kind of crappy romantic comedy they cooked up a plan to get us together. They told me that she wanted to meet me at a movie theatre and they told Kara that I wanted to meet her there. We ended up together watching Vegas Vacation and when she reached over to hold my hand I was literally fucking terrified. 

What I’m realizing is that sort of anxiety is almost like a kind of class feature for nerds. I got tons of mail from guys who aren’t using these systems to abuse girls or score one night stands. They are using them for the reasons that I listed jokingly. They really are trying to learn to be more confident and get past their anxiety with girls. They feel like all the douche bags out there give the system a bad name and more then one recommended a book called the Game by Neil Strauss. Where as I had pretty much given up on the idea of ever meeting a girl these guys are going out and trying to get help. I’m not sure how I can blame them for that.

In my exchange with tycho I was trying to do a bit, I was playing a part and I thought I was making a joke. I guess I was being a little more honest then I really understood. Now obviously I don’t think women are evil witches ensorcelling men with their magic vaginas. I’m a 31 year old married guy with a kid and a much clearer view of the world thanks to the miracles of modern chemistry. What I can say to all the guys mailing me about this system is that the girls you’re so terrified to talk to, are just as scared of you. I’ve got guys mailing me saying they don’t know how long they should wait before calling a girl or if it’s okay to ask for their phone number. They are worried about not understanding the rules of some imaginary game. My advice for what it’s worth,  is that the girls you really want aren’t playing a game, and they won’t expect you to play one either.

-Gabe out

Tycho

If things have gone well for me on this go ‘round, it’s because I’m constantly being given opportunities to learn things.  That is to say, I have had many opportunities to be savaged by reality in ironically appropriate ways.  I don’t know exactly what I’m supposed to emerge from some of these experiences with, but I do emerge from them, armed for the next surreal asault from a hostile universe.

The most recent example occurred last night at around midnight, when an old friend told me that he was actually an instructor for Love Systems.  They use handles, so I never put two and two together.  I had a very robust model - completely imaginary - decribing both the sort of person who would attend a course of this kind and the sort of depraved animal who would transmit this kind of parselmouth bullshit to lonely men in a desperate, daily search for a less brutal existence.  That’s not who this guy is, this friend of mine.  He is, unmistakably, one of us.

I thought you might find his mail to me interesting.  I asked him about negging, which is usually framed as being purposefully insulting to a woman, and received the following Goddamned novella.

-

It’s harmless and normal between two people to tease or even, in the case of you and Mike, insult. How much outlandish and even insulting inside jokes do you have with Brenna or does Mike have with Kara? 

When you call Mike this or that caustic name, you do it because you know you can and because you’re friends. Our students—and probably most men—have elaborate belief systems made around how women are and how men and women interact. A lot of these systems are either misguided or blatantly false (to wit: women don’t want to be picked up when they go out to a bar). The neg gets attention because it SEEMS like an insult, but it’s more a gesture of comfort, a sign that you, the suitor, aren’t going to bend your natural conversational style for the sake of trying to impress a woman. The main reason why assholes get girls is not because girls are just dying to be abused and ignored—although some are for whatever fault of upbringing or genetics—but because women, especially beautiful women, hate the weakness implied when a man bends over backward to impress her. A reactive sign of this is to, um, not bend over to impress her. A proactive sign, a way to signal this in the first few minutes of conversation, is to tease her. 

And the neg is just a tiny sliver of what we teach. 

More than anything our material is about understanding what makes women attracted to men beyond the obvious answers of looks and money and power, beyond the simple snipe of “confidence”. We then help our students implement that understanding through practical application, i.e. actually trying to pick up the girls you are attracted to. 

Mike noted that if it’s guys “hunting women from the back of a jeep” he’s not behind that. What does he (or you) think guys are doing every single time they go out to a bar or club? As my mother has noted during the times I wore a hair shirt about my job, Love Systems didn’t invent the act of guys going out and trying to find girls to have sex with. We just gave guys the tools to do it effectively without boring girls. Our course lets guys make their own calls. For my part, I try to explain the ethical ramifications of hollow sexual interactions, and I try to emphasize the role that developing personal standards for the people with whom you surround yourself has in developing standards for yourself… But if a guy takes away scummy lessons, I am not there to change him. At my last bootcamp, though, there was a gentleman who had an MFA and poetry and ran a non-profit. I just don’t see him as the sleazy guy at the bar with his chest hair poking out, you know? But he had just left a divorce, has two daughters he loves very much, and he wants to know how to interface with the modern world of dating. Mike happened to meet Kara in line at Star Wars. Romances spark at events like PAX and Comic Con. And some people—most people—are content to live day to day and luck into chemistry and attraction. But every guy has seen a girl who has taken his breath away, or been on a date that didn’t end with a comic strip proposing marriage to her through his alter ego, a date where the girl decided, inexplicably, that she just wanted to be friends. 

I am a nerd. I can run D&D 1st, 2nd, or 3rd from memory with very little help, and I have a Planescape: Torment tattoo proudly on my right arm. Just TALKING about Shadowrun gets my excited. I have an encyclopedic knowledge of Marvel and DC comics, and I have strong feelings about what Batman would or would NOT do in any given situation. I built my computer, and I’m going to build my next one, to say nothing of the hundreds of servers I built in the Marines.

And beautiful women, the women I would want from afar, used to scare the shit out of me. 

Our kind, the nerds, are the worst of the lot, man! How many girls did YOU have at your gaming table? They are thin on the ground in my weekly d20 modern group and in my XBox Live Friends list, and I don’t think I’m overreaching with my anecdotal evidence when I say my experience is not abnormal. I’m sure we both have compelling reasons for WHY girls might steer clear of our favorite hobby, but the simple reality is that gaming, even when there are comparitively a LOT of girls, is still going to see WAY more men than women.  It doesn’t grant us the same male/female socialization tools that say, sports does. 

-

Jeezy Creezy.  This thing is a fucking rabbit hole.

(CW)TB
Tycho

People have been asking me when the Cardboard Tube Samurai statue thing was going on sale.  The answer is: now.

(CW)TB