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It's Race Night!

It's sometimes the case that Jerry and I create jokes and then you guys help us embellish them. The greatest example of this I believe is the Epic Legends of the Hierarchs: The Elemenstor Saga. Jerry and I cooked up the name of this setting and gave a few examples such as Grimm Shado. We also claimed that this made up fantasy BS was a rich IP that spanned decades and included books, cartoons and all sorts of amazing stuff. The Penny Arcade audience then went completely bat shit and created a massive wiki that attempted to collect all the information there was about this non existent franchise. Jerry and I just watched as this thing grew by the hour and soon I was drawing fan art of my favorite Wizbit. I understand if you don’t remember Wizbits, it was a “re-imagining” of the Japanese anime ElamenSTAR which originally aired in Japan in 1996, as a cross promotion with the collectible card game ElemenSTAR Card Battle renamed Wizbits Elemenstor Battle for the US.  

Hold The Yogurt

I feel bad sometimes because I talk about Game Pass a lot. I think you're supposed to angle to get paid or something, to ply the Influencer's Trade, and there may be nothing more suckerian than shilling in a context where no schillings have changed hands.

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Tarzhei

I did make an effort to secure an Xbox Series X, using a link Gabriel was turned on to later, and I could get all the way to the end of the process but attempting to make a purchase just made the top of the page turn yellow. It suggested a link I could click for more information, and I did so, learning that the reason I wasn't able to make the purchase was (a shifting, twenty character alphanumeric kaleidoscope).

Target Zero.

Target was a real shit show yesterday along with every other store I tried to buy an Xbox Series X from. Target was especially frustrating in that it kept telling me I had one in my cart but wouldn’t let me buy it. I had pretty much given up when I got sent a link to the MS store via twitter that people claimed was working. I was skeptical and the site was a bit slow but all be damned if it didn’t work! So I did manage to score a Series X on launch day but looking around it seems like I was one of the lucky ones. I know they will make more and eventually they’ll be easy to get but I’ve always been a sucker for new hardware, it’s a weakness in my genes. 

Standard Operating Procedure

A lot of dinners I had to eat much later because of the schedule, I just had something going on then, I was being beamed to various places and because I was not corporeal at that time I could not eat. Gotta have a mouth for that. But I still ate more than I would have at a regular PAX, which is basically nothing but whatever nuts and seeds are being pulverized at the bottom of my backpack. I did go to the Cheesecake Factory once, yes, my mom was there, and I think that is the kind of place you go with your mom. What they brought me to eat was an aggressive, fried sculpture that defied the diner to contend with it. It was a kind of martial challenge delivered in the dialectic of lunch.

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The Name Of The Wind

Because "compatibility," broadly writ, is sort of an assumption for The Last Generation of Consoles the intensity with which one must seek out a platform's Exemplar is diluted somewhat. At least, for me. Gabriel craves a gadget, and so when he is denied one it is keenly felt. The PS4 Pro and the One X have more than enough beef to let me ride out these dessications of supply, caused - as I understand it - by a clan of nano-augmented raiders called "The Axiom." Any suffering it might engender will be of exceedingly short duration.

Mobster Energy

Monster Energy is a company that makes hummingbird food, and they are under the impression that this grants them primacy over a term whose etymological loam is Latin, causing them to spasmodically whip and gnash at completely reasonable uses of the word like Ubisoft's Gods and Monsters. Ubi did change the name, saying it was a creative decision, but it's hard to imagine an undisturbed creative process that results in the only name more pale and derivative than Gods And Monsters.

Zone Defense

Had a blast with the Make A Strip panel yesterday, an ancient PAX tradition manifest this strip and also in the nearly twelve thousand dollars raised for Child's Play Charity in exchange for the application of an exclusive, show specific fairy. At a suggestion from the ineluctable Gavin Greco, said fairy is modeled after the humble Webcam, a device whose star has risen substantially in this incredibly haunted year.

Praxis Online

Gabe and I don't really see each other at PAX shows if we aren't on stage together; that's not just how our thing works. Plus, we are both introverts who have somehow been drafted for Maximum Social Exposure, so a certain amount of the time there is spent in our climate controlled rooms waiting for our bars to fill back up.

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Penny Arcade League Race!

The Penny Arcade iRacing league rolls on. Tonight we're racing the Dallara F3 car at the Daytona International Speedway. I'm going to attempt to participate in the livery theme of "pets on parade" but this might just end up being a big photo of one of my cats stretched across the entire car. Last week was so close to being decent that I still have nightmares about that final lap. I've moved on, and hopefully so have the people whose races I ruined because I'm a fool have as well.  I've got Kara spotting and my son Gabe producing tonight's race which starts at 8:00PT but expect the Pit Crew to open closer to 7:30PT. Kara and I won't not be drinking!

Before You Re-Reckon Yourself

I was watching some streams of it, the new Amalur, or… the Old Amalur, all the Amalur we really got. Honestly, I don't think Gabe is super off here. When you change the lens you look at it with, slot one in that says this is an earnest indie's love letter to an era, it's a lot more fun than it should be. And the feel isn't wrong either, because these motherfuckers swung for the Goddamn fence.

PAX Online Indie Showcase

One of the ancient rites of our people is the PAX 10, historically a physical space to honor and explore the umami richness of the Indie scene.  Because PAX Online is unfettered by your crass physicality, we can expand the number of titles we feature here substantially.  Which is a good fucking thing, because we had more submissions this time than ever.  Over double, literally.  Sounds like everybody's been busy…?  Here they are - your PAX Online Indie Showcase.