Both stories in this strip are true, true, true. There was even a time when another player took an opportunity between rounds to strike his girlfriend, producing a haunting crack and a yip, but it was difficult to find the joke in it.

Chronicles of Riddick: Escape From Butcher Bay is actually one of the games I was going to talk about, so I'll just link the strip concerning it and then we'll move forward like normal.

There's something fucked up with the upload script, so this will have to do for the time being: here is the strip, and here is the mobile version.

I told you I would write something for you, something in addition to the product I am sworn to produce, and I have failed thus far. Every time I sit down to write something, I remember with a level of joy usually reserved for the birthdays of children that this machine - the same machine I'm typing on - can also be used to play Thief 3, also known as Thief: Deadly Shadows. I will complete a mission in Thief, realize the extent of my failures toward you the reader, and say that I will only allow myself to complete four or five levels in Mario Vs Donkey Kong - four or five, and no more. What typically happens then is that I feel like playing a little more Thief, and having completed another level I will be overcome with guilt at not having written anything, declaring that I will play no more Thief forever, I grab the GBA because really each individual level takes only a few minutes to play through. This loop reiterated itself virtually all day Saturday, and other than pure joy, indeed, joy concentrate, I have nothing to show for it.

The Seattle Children's Hospital is holding a telethon on channel 4 June 12th. They have asked us to come on and re-present them with the huge 27,000 check we gave them back in December. We'll have a few minutes to talk about what Child's play did last year and what we're planning on doing this year. If you live in the Seattle area you should tune in on June 12th and check it out.

I have been answering e-mail since nine this morning, which to my mind is a very long Goddamn time. I'm sorry if you've been waiting for the Live stuff I promised you, but I really had no idea that it was going to take this long. I will post this weekend, which hardly ever happens - hopefully it will help to settle our account.

We're working super hard to make PAX the coolest fucking convention ever and I've got some new stuff to share with you.

You asked for a version of the “tea with the moon” image on a black background and here it is.

I got 2000 emails about the Twisp and Catsby print in less than two days. I think it's safe to say you guys want them. Let me try and answer some of the questions I got regarding how it might work.

In his review of The Singles, the sensual Greg Kasavin takes great pains to remind us that the game is from Europe - and he's right. It is. When I was in Italy for a short while, you could see things in ordinary commercials which contained scenes I'd have to be 18 to see here. People would have sex for twenty seconds, and then it would show what I imagine is some kind of abrasive cleanser. These days, I'm something of a connoisseur where erotica is concerned, and like all gourmets my fetish requires custom equipment.

This thing is really coming along - check out the new level, and exquisite zombie model.

I’ve got more new artwork for you.

I just received this excellent mail from a developer.

A few readers wrote in to ask me if I had a chance to see Myst IV, and I did - they've moved away from the real-time rendered worlds, which is bad, but that also removes the third person bullshit from Uru that never belonged there, which is good. Gamespot learned things I didn't know, like the fact that you can interact with the environment in ways that do not involve swtiches and byzantine devices - check it out, if you're interested.

Available free over at Garage Games, Produce Panic is a multiplayer, Penny Arcade themed shooter that pits the players against each other as randy, rival Fruit Fuckers. The levels are all drawn from the strip, and are packed with things that readers will recognize. There is even a movie theater in hell which, in addition to Tomb Raider and the Tetris Movie, also shows the latest strip up on the screen. It is free, as I mentioned, but the guys at Plan B Games are accepting donations for their work - if you enjoyed it, please let them know.

God, it's like I can't shut up today.